Iligan City – If digital technology has made today’s world smaller for it seems, almost everything has easily become accessible, will the bonds of friendship deepen?
If today’s generation will put value on friendships where respect and love for each other are at a premium, there would be peace in our world.
As children we made friends not necessarily out of class considerations, race or based on wealth and influence. Somehow, other factors shape choices of friends as children grow up and the influence of parents on their growing children can’t be underestimated. These days however, children are more exposed to what happens in the world.
I used to sit with my two grandchildren to watch the cartoons and movies available to them.
Often the subject matter is for young adults and the language and culture are foreign to our own. I resolved to guide the kids to better programs and when the opportunity came, as a literature major, I would explain certain points in Disney films such as “Cinderella”, “Tangled”, “Sleeping Beauty”, “Aladdin”, and other movies from other countries. This is probably why my granddaughter has had enough of ‘princess roles’ in school and would refuse such assignments.
But, I could not be with the kids all the time. They also preferred certain programs that were annoying to me. But, their skills in the use of gadgets is simply amazing – gadgets that we never had in my generation.
In high school, a teacher used to tell our class, “all you have to do is pick up a phone and you can already talk to another in New York or London”.
At the time, long-distance calls were relatively new and strange. Years later, after the Beatles and the Rolling Stones have been superseded by other bands in the airwaves, we simply couldn’t keep pace with how fast technology has developed.
Today, gadgets are relatively easy to be had and enjoyed. I ‘ve not imagined technology would develop so fast that video chats or teleconferences are available for convenience.
One Sunday in this humid July I was having this leisurely breakfast at home and I overheard my 8-year-old granddaughter Yuko Olga Kirsten having a video chat with her best friend, 8-year-old Miyuki Ambe who is based in Queensland, Australia.
Both love to paint and share stories. As I listened to their lively exchange, I marveled at how they have become so agile in juggling their cellphones and ipads showing each other’s games, analyzing these and describing each other’s favorite characters like pros.
Once in a while, the connection would turn bad in this part of Mindanao while each one was showing virtually the other’s games, drawings and later, Miyuki’s garden. Both seemed to understand that such glitzes happen and when the connection got better, they would continue and pick up from where they’ve left off.
Once, Yuko Olga Kirsten suddenly ran out of the dining area, held up her cell phone so Miyuki could see this problematic dog in the garage — the dog that hated the dog house Yuko Olga Kirsten had designed for it, and for whom the girl had a quarrel over with her brother Yuri Mikhail, 10.
Yuri Mikhail had tossed a chocolate bar at the dog. An incensed Yuko Olga Kirsten screamed, “if the dog eats chocolate, it will die!”
With mere clicks, I’ve wondered about this ease in getting information on just about anything. When Yuko Olga Kirsten had a sore throat, she picked up her cellphone and asked Google what to drink and she was told ‘tea’ would somehow ease the pain. That alarmed me because the downside is, the kids rely on immediate solutions from gadgets. Encouraging interactions between another human person is really important at this stage.
The friendship between the girls bloomed after a photo shoot during the Southeast Asian edition for a newsmagazine I was editing. Children of MSU-IIT faculty and staff were selected and they dressed up in various national attires of the SEA countries.
And when the friendship began to flower, Miyuki, her brother Jacob and her parents left for Australia. It was a sad time for Yuko Olga Kirsten after both girls had a long goodbye and photos were taken by myself and Miyuki’s grandma, Nering.
A few days later Yuko Olga Kirsten came running to me and asked “Can I go to Australia tomorrow to play with Miyuki?” I said no, not tomorrow, right there understanding the pang of separation one so young was experiencing.
I recall now a young boy crying over his father’s coffin at one of Iligan’s funeral homes. He was also about 8 years old. He cried for all to hear, ‘now, I’ve lost you Dad, my best friend”.
That struck me as cruel for some parents who are too insular in their thinking not allowing their children to have friends their age. At least, when tragedy strikes, a child can have a friend to share his fears and sadness after a loved one goes. I promised right there to encourage my own kids to have friends.
My own sons grew up with close neighbors, both Christians and Muslims, learning from each other’s cultures and religions, and yes, languages. And all supported each other during sad times.
These boys have grown up and most are married yet, they get together during holidays. These genuine friendships have held and are bound to last a lifetime.
With digital technology, the friendship across the sea between Miyuki and Yuko Olga Kirsten is sustained until they see each other again. Surely, there is a happy side to this long-distance friendship aided by digital technology, that is, it has helped them experience what deep friendship means.
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